no. 576 – It’s Not Free If It Will Cost You Your Sanity

One of the things I’ve always wanted to do through this blog is a PSA that warn others about filling out those promotional cards that you get from the doctor’s office and maternity/baby stores. Yesterday’s post triggered a reminder.

The first time I filled them out I was pregnant with XBoy. A tra-la-la-ing I went into my pregnancy with nary a concern. I was tickled to receive free diapers, formula, magazines, etc. It was free! Who doesn’t love FREE, even if it’s crap.

Then came Vivienne. I made it through the first trimester, but I really didn’t think anything about the hurdle except I was hoping I wouldn’t feel so shitty all the time. I went to The Metro to get myself some new maternity clothes. Stopped in at Satan’s Lair Mimi Maternity and when I went to pay for my purchase (a soft pink cardigan set – I remember it as if it were yesterday), they asked me some demographic data as well as my due date. Again, tra-la-fucking-la…

A week later I encountered the spotting. Vivienne was dead and probably had been as I was doling out her due date to a stranger who couldn’t care less. After my D&C, I was horrified when promotional items showed up in the mail. Not just that, but I had signed up on a website for weekly pregnancy updates and every time I sat down to the computer, I would get a "Your baby is now 17 weeks old!" "Your baby is now 18 weeks old!"

I don’t remember when I finally unsubscribed, but when I did, I was hit in the face yet again. By unsubscribing, they ask why, including, "Was there a miscarriage?" I clicked Yes and was sent automatically to those horrible chat boards ("Even though I was told to wait two cycles before trying again, I got pregnant right after my miscarriage!" "Sending you baby dust!" "They told me my baby had died but at a final ultrasound before the D&C, they found the heart beating again!").

I knew that those boards were not for me (The cynicism is strong in this one!). I never heard of a blog until we started fertility treatments six months later.

A really shitty lesson, trust me. So that’s why I don’t fill out the promo cards and I never will. Maybe my friends think I’m cuckoo for telling them to avoid them as well, but I do and I’ve told them why. I don’t care if they think I’m overly paranoid or borderline nuts. I’m happy to report that I’ve never had to say, "I told you so." Not that I would. I’m just sayin’…