XBoy “took a tumble” (his words) Wednesday at school down the church steps (outside). He said he tripped, fell on his head and then flipped over. He had a knot on his forehead and a scraped up knee. No blood. He said the grown-ups and his classmates came to his aid.

He’s fine.

However, do you think that this incident qualifies for a formal notification to the parents, via either a note, email, phone call, etc., or not?

I ask because we did not know about this until we noticed his knee during his bath that night. I did see he had a red mark on his forehead when I had picked him up at five but didn’t think much of it as he has a tendency to bump into things (I think I’ve mentioned before his large head which tends to screw with his center of balance).

I am wondering if I should have expected a note about it or if I’m just being an overprotective Mom. If you wouldn’t expect a note for this example, what kind of injury would you expect to receive notice for, whether it’s daycare or school?


  1. I think any head injury needs to be told to parents. At the very least you should know in case he starts complaining about a headache etc. I don’t think you are being over protective at all.

  2. I wouldn’t necessarily expect a note/email if it had been only a scraped knee. A head injury is something that I would *always* expect to be notified about.

  3. I think they should have at the very least said something to you when you picked him up. They could have called or put a note out to you…something.

    A paper cut, no big deal. A tumble down the steps that left scratches and he hit his head, yes. You need to know what happened.

  4. Our preschool was totally anal about notifications, wrote everything in an incident report, and always called ahead to warn me if my girl had sustained any visible face injuries during the day so I wouldn’t be frightened when I saw her.

    Her elementary school has done absolutely NOTHING, and she’s fallen quit a few times. I agree that any kind of head injury should be reported, and hope it was “just” an oversight in this case. I don’t think you are being overprotective at all.

  5. Our kids bring home a note if ANYTHING happens in school that could possibly leave a mark, or even if it couldn’t. Also, we had one kid smack her head on a lunch table this week (which led to an immediate trip to the doctor to check for concussion), and then eldest child got smacked in the head with a hockey stick today (4 stitches, right below her eye.) SO. YES, I think they should have notified you.

  6. Seems like they should have notified you since it involved a head injury. I mean, just because there’s no blood doesn’t mean that there might not have been a concussion and you’d think they’d tell you in case other symptoms popped up later so you could decide whether the injury warranted going to the doctors or not.

  7. The Boy has a large cranium, too!

    At daycare and preschool, there was an accident report we had to sign no matter how large or small the owie. Now school must be different, because The Boy has come home with bandaids applied by the teacher, but no notes. I thought it strange, too.

  8. As a former 4th grade teacher, I would have notified the parent. Most of the time I called the parents just because calling gave the parents a chance to ask me any questions without having to wait until the next day to get ahold of me. Plus written documentation was always done any time a student saw the school nurse. I’m definitely a little surprised that you didn’t get a note or call.

  9. A head injury should always result in parental notification. Always.

    I get notified about every little incident with Ramekin at this end. It’s required by law over here.

  10. They DEFINITELY should have told you. Head injuries can be very unpredictable and not informing a parent is really negligent. Joey`s nursery are really anal about reports and every time he hurts himself I have to sign a report about what happened. I will be interested to see how this changes when he goes up a class.

  11. Daycare rules here require all things to be written up and reported regardless of seriousness for kids 5 and under.

    School and older daycares get a little looser, and we only find out if there is blood or visible incidents like vomit, etc… The head injury should’ve been mentioned just because if he got sicker later and you had to take him in, the doc would want to know about concussion issues. (Even just to say, “no he didn’t pass out, no, he didn’t see double, no he wasn’t unable to stand, etc…”)

  12. Dear DD, definitely they should have notified you. Definitely. If there had been any complications afterwards (God forbid) you would have had to know what had happened. I am not impressed at all, and would be quite pissy with them.

    I don’t know why the heck I didn’t comment on your last post, (although I suspect the reason involved a howling child, I’ll wager) because I wanted to tell you how lovely you are. And oddly enough I got a very similar haircut just a few weeks ago, and felt very much the same about it as you did about yours. It just doesn’t do what I want it to, and the passage of time only makes it worse.

    But back to more serious head matters. You would be completely justified in kicking some school butt.

  13. R’s pre-school writes up incident reports on EVERYTHING. Usually by the time I pick her up whatever mark there was is gone and I’m never sure how much worry I’m supposed to show about it….
    And then there’s C’s school, where I was sent home a don’t-worry-he-got-knocked-down-while-sledding note only to find he had two scraped knees and some ominous-looking rib bruising in the bath that night because CHILDREN HAD SAT ON HIM.

    I expect to hear about everything. And if the school is smart, they’d document everything, even with no blood.

  14. I think they owed you a note for this one. Five still seems young to me and it involved a crack on the head. I can also see the point about notes dwindling as the child gets older because they can tell your themselves, still 5 seems young.

  15. I’m trying to remember what my school did — I’m pretty sure it was similar to LH’s. We got checked out by the school nurse, and as long as there was nothing requiring more than a band-aid, we went back to class. Blood and more serious injuries got a phone call home and/or a note from the nurse. But if you had no visible damage and she asked if you were okay, and you said “fine”, that was that.

  16. My daycare actually goes overborad on the “incident reports”
    ei: Maggie bit her lip today while running on the playground. Gave ice-pop.
    On the other hand, Will fell on the sidewalk & bumped his head on the CONCRETE wall. Caregiver met me at the door to tell me in person instead of writing it up. In that case, I WANTED documentation in the file & asked her to write a report.

  17. I’ve had similar experiences with my kids as they’ve gotten older. When they were toddlers I got notified of everything. I think that was because they couldn’t tell me themselves. As they’ve grown into preschoolers, bumps and bruises (sometimes rather large) don’t get documented unless there is flowing blood or they were caused by another child. I’ve decided that I’m okay with that. I also feel free to talk to the teachers and directors if I’m concerned.

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