I Wouldn’t Call It a Foot Fetish

A friend and I were discussing pedicures the other day and it reminded me of my Foa Pa post from last year, which I should offer the disclaimer that the spelling of Faux Pas was indeed intentional. Part of the joke, as it were.

I personally don’t care for pedicures. Something about having a stranger touch and massage my feet gives me the willies. Maybe it’s because I feel a little guilty that someone might associate my visits with hairy toes and sandpaper heels.

I am still able to give some rudimentary attention to my feet, but I shamefully admit, it’s getting a little harder. My french pedicure looks like someone with with hand tremors painted my toe nails – while blindfolded. But from five feet away, they look acceptable. I’ve even managed to “buff” away the winter foot, although I do miss being able to scratch my leg by just running my heel up against the offending itch in the middle of the night. So what if I snagged the sheets occasionally?

During the conversation with my friend, we discussed the pedegg. Basically a battery operated cheese grater/citrus zester. What else could explain the contents that are supposedly emptied because I can’t and won’t imagine it to be sloughed, foot skin? Watch the promotional video on their website to get the whole affect.

This led me to wonder if it would be considered rude for me to keep a purse full of inexpensive buffers to hand out as needed to the people who haven’t realized yet that when they are wearing sandals/flip flops/mules that WE CAN SEE THEIR NASTY FEET! I think if I kept low-key they might not be offended – much like the gum commercial that pimps that industrial sized container of breath fresheners for the friendly, halitosis challenged office-mate.

It’s not that I’m being judgmental (OK, I’m being TOTALLY judgmental), but please, if you are living in the northern hemisphere, and therefore experiencing spring- and summer-like weather. check your feet. Now that I have mine in a semi-presentable state, I’ll schedule¬† an actual pedicure. Much like cleaning the house before the cleaning lady comes over.