MY MOM WENT TO WALLYWORLD AND ALL SHE GOT WAS THIS STUPID BABY

bag-baby1

This picture is visual proof that somewhere out there is a store that you can go in and get all your baby supplies including the baby. Now, someone please tell me, where the hell is it?

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The picture is from an article out of Mail Online, the best source of serious European journalism if ever there was one.

Parents spend £27,500 ($41,000)  on their children before they reach the age of three, it was revealed yesterday.

Two-thirds (£18,000/$26,000) of that amount is spent before the youngsters’ first birthday, according to a study of 3,000 mothers by Gurgle.com, a social networking site for new parents.

It found that the costs start piling up even before conception, with many women splashing out on weekends away (17 per cent) and treatments such as acupuncture (13 per cent) to get pregnant.

Expectant mothers then spend an average of £4,000 ($6,000) – including £91.45 ($136) on clothes and £71.79 ($107) on toys – on the unborn baby.

Some 94 per cent of parents also bought their child a Christmas and birthday present in the first year, spending an average of £68.83 ($103) – despite admitting that their baby was far too young to remember the gift.

The high cost of raising children meant 40 per cent of parents said the credit crunch has affected the desire to expand their family.

But Nifa McLaughlin of Gurgle said: ‘There are lots of ways to keep the costs down, from accepting hand-me-downs to making your own baby clothes to knowing where to go for free activities.’

So I go to Gurgle.com, register, find tools, and then the baby calculator, which is preceded by this blurb:

BABY BUDGET CALCULATOR, BUDGETING FOR BABY (redundant much?)

Here at gurgle we know that babies cost a lot of money, in fact parenting in general costs a lot of money.

In times of recession and financial crisis parents may have to dig deep into their pockets.

That’s why we’ve created a baby budget calculator to help you to plan ahead and be more financially prepared when it comes to budgeting for baby!

Simply fill out your details below and we’ll work out what you could spend over the first three years of your child’s life.

 
Cool, huh??

Oh, wait. There’s nothing there. No calculator, no number-cruncher, nada. Just a blank box. Maybe Gurgle.com was budget-cutting and cut the calculator tool. The only thing the calculator told me was that if THAT is what they (Gurgle) were basing their “study” on, then Gurgle? THAT is not a study. That’s a bunch of baby-dust snorting and bits-crossing women making up wish lists for their potential oh-em-gee!-we’re-going-to-have-a-BABEEEE! *blargh*

What slays me is this statement, “It found that the costs start piling up even before conception.” How much BEFORE conception are we talking about? I know we wracked up quite an amount before we had XBoy, what with getting married and buying a house. So what if it was three years before his conception? With ZGirl, we plunked down a mere 20% of that $41K FOR her conception. I wonder if they are figuring in the vacations these couples take to “just relax” before they conceive?

On the other hand, I really think they are under-reporting the amount spent on clothes and toys since a stupid bumbo is $35 alone (or does that not count as a toy?).

Let’s get some real information based on REAL women:

  • How much did you spend on trying to get pregnant “naturally” (vacations, massage oils, wine, etc)?
  • How much did you spend on homeopathic remedies (acupuncture, massages, supplements, wine, etc.)?
  • How much did you spend on fertility treatments (office visits, scans, drugs, procedures, wine, etc.)?
  • How much did you spend on disposables (tampons/pads, FREDs, OPKs, wine, etc.)?
  • And finally, for those this applies to, how much did you end up spending on actual baby products (clothes, toys, equipment -no wine since that’s something to call CPS about-, etc.)?

Rough estimates will do. I’m sure I’ll still be able to call it a “study”.

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