Check Yourself Before You Wreck Yourself

I have found that there are actually blogs out there that don’t blog about infertility.

*collective gasp*

I know!

The following list of blogs will help give you a little self-check if you’re ever in doubt about the way to act in almost any socially unacceptable situation:

Ugliest Tattoos (NSFW) is full of (what do the cool chicks say?), the AWESOME! but certainly not what I would consider safe for work, hence the NSFW.

Sidenote: It wasn’t until I clicked on a NSFW site that I realized what NSFW meant. Not awesome. That’s why I read everything through a reader.

Lamebook. You will feel much better about your own Facebook updates, trust me.

Awkward Family Photos. Good clean fun.

Then there’s STFU, Parents. I wince. A lot. I’m pretty sure it’s out of sheer luck that I haven’t found myself there. If YOU do end up on there, I promise* not to hide your updates out of embarrassment.

But it’s this last one that I just. can’t. look. away! For whatever reason, there is no title to the blog, just a URL (NSFW, either) http://whythefuckdoyouhaveakid.com/

I’ll warn you that some of the posts make me alternate between almost crying, queasy, and very, VERY, angry.

The following photo example is a rather tame one (in comparison to the majority of what’s posted):

"becuz you need someone to spot the bargains on the bottom shelf"
"becuz you need someone to spot the bargains on the bottom shelf"

See the kid in the circle pitching a fit and mom just ignoring him? Yeah, been there, done that.

But WHOA! *double take* The hell?! Let’s take another look, shall we?

why a kida

Is that wo/man undressing? Maybe flashing a computer video camera?! Especially full of the WTF-titude considering that if you cropped the picture to just the woman in the foreground, it looks like a commercial shot.

* crossing fingers

Bottles Up

I’m pretty sure that by the time my son was 15 mos old, we had him completely weaned from the bottle. Completely. Not even before bedtime.

The reason I tell you this is because I’m sitting here right now in front of my laptop while my daughter is next to me on the couch having a bottle. It’s not her only one, either. She has one first thing in the morning and two, sometimes three, during the rest of the day.

Of course it’s easier than sippy cups. I don’t care what the packaging says, those damn cups all leak. So do bottles for that matter, but I will get about 15 minutes of pure blissful silence when she has a bottle. The only thing I ever hear when she has a bottle is the gasps for air in between sucks. A cup she drinks from, a couple of swallows, and then off she goes to play. Lord knows where that stupid sippy cup goes in the mean time.

Is it laziness? Maybe I’m clinging to that last remnant of babydom. Except for diapers…

Some mothers nurse their babies until they are two or three? Why can’t she have a bottle until she’s 18 months? Plus, she says ba-ba. She doesn’t say cu.

And my 15 minutes of silence is just about up. Now hit me: should I cut her cold turkey at this point or keep trying to fade one bottle at a time out of her schedule?