Gas Mask

I heard the door open and shut as Sparring Partner entered the house. I then heard, “thththrrrrpppppthh!”

“What the hell? You couldn’t have done that out in the garage?”

“I didn’t know it was going to happen!”

What internal structural part of you is damaged that you don’t know you’re going to fart before you fart?


C’mon, men. Just admit that you thought you could sneak it out, but failed.

6 thoughts on “Gas Mask”

  1. Yeah. Mine was in bed and pulled that – then when I screeched that I could feel him PUSHING, he claimed that if he didn’t let it out, he might get cramps.

    And then I killed him. The end.

    The moral of the story: Fart in the bathroom, you great ninny. Or watch at what time of the month you casually bandy the word ‘cramps’ about.

    1. I don’t care IF they fart, but c’mon! Be a man about it and just admit it – it was intentional. They don’t just “slip out” nor is it “uncontrollable.” Say “excuse me” and move on!

You can say it here.

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