Up and Down, Down, Down

I’ve been thrown into another funk. I’m not sure if they are more frequent or if it feels that way because I have happier days followed by hard crashes.

While I knew what the outcome would be, the response to my follow-up email to the HR department still made me flush in humiliation, “While the position has not yet been filled, Management is not interested in conducting a second interview.” Don’t take it personally? How else should I take it?

Also, I have been anticipating a trip to Boston later this spring specifically to meet up with some friends I have never met. Yes, blogging friends. However, the anticipation and excitement has been dampened by my fear of traveling by myself and trying to get around a city I’m utterly incapable of alone. I thought I would surprise Sparring Partner by planning a covert getaway as it would be on the weekend of our anniversary (I was even able to line up care for Aitch and Doodicus), but after all my hinting to a holiday without the kids, SP is adamant he does not want to go anywhere. Finally I just asked him if he would come with me to Boston. He said no. And that was that.

So now I don’t know what to do. If you’re from the Boston area and you have some advice on how to overcome my fears as a small town farm girl getting around a big city by herself, feel free to impart your wisdom and advice.

Combine the above with my ever increasing perception of my dysmorphism issues; I’m just feeling more than a little malaised.