Drifting, Lacking, Wanting

I hadn’t mentioned it earlier because to be honest, it’s really just kind of humiliating…I’m starting another temp job (about six weeks) with part-time hours. I’ll be traveling within the area to different schools and taking pictures. Quite honestly, I would have preferred to just to have stayed at home and collect my first unemployment check, but Sparring Partner wasn’t going for that.

It’s gutting me. Unemployment. I got an email from one employer that said, “We regret that you are no longer considered for XYZ position because you did not meet our minimum requirements.” What exactly were the minimum requirements I didn’t meet? I don’t know. I didn’t go back and pull up the description, but I have to believe that is just their rejection form letter (which doesn’t allow for replies) and that my experience and education aren’t really lacking considering the rather entry-level position.

One of the positions I was overlooked where I was tempingĀ for a year and a half was filled by a woman who got a position I had applied for back in January with another company. I heard that she then quit to accept another position I applied for elsewhere. She then quit to take the job where I was temping. In eight months, she had three jobs. All of them I had applied for. This was the same woman who on her first week of employment called in sick three of the five days.

If I was you reading me, I would have long ago wondered what the fuck was wrong with me that I can’t get a job. I think my husband has started to wonder, too. I feel like my spirit is being crushed slowly especially tonight when after Doodicus’s Teacher Meet-Up we had to tell him we couldn’t go to Pizza Hut as a kind of last hurrah before school starts on Wednesday “because we have to cut back until I can find a job”; or when we had to limit the costĀ of his new school shoes to $40 or less; or when I reused colored pencils and crayons from the past few years instead of buying new; or when I went through the “gently used” school uniforms to see if there were any good finds.

We are not on welfare or anything like that, but knowing that I had to agree with Sparring Partner that we couldn’t enjoy a meal out…? Even I have accepted that a job really isn’t going to be around the corner any time soon.