When “Right” isn’t “Fair”

Truer words were never written. There hasn’t been a day that has gone by since Fall 2008 that I hadn’t thought something to this effect. Giving a stranger permission to possibly apply a less-than-perfect label on a perfect-in-my-eyes child was something I never could have prepared myself to accept.

And yet there’s something about signing, about taking the pen in hand and making that mechanical squiggle, saying, “Yes, please classify my child,” that feels like standing over Pandora’s Box, reading the packing list carefully, and then asking for a crowbar. Like we’re setting something big and possibly dangerous in motion without knowing how it works. Simultaneously like we’re doing the right thing for our child, and like we’re selling him down the river.

Thank you, Julie, for saying it best.

2 thoughts on “When “Right” isn’t “Fair””

  1. When I was reading Julie’s post this morning, I thought about you and wondered if you had read it, too. Her words have been weighing on my mind since and I’m still not quite sure how I feel. If TK had autism or ADHA (or anything else for that matter) on the one hand I would want to know even if it puts a label on him. Because knowing means maybe I could better support him or give him what he needs. On the other hand, that label in the minds of other people can become a hurtful thing and who would want to put their child in that position?

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