no. 532 – I Waited All Weekend For This?!

Would you mind if I just glaze over the inspiration for my last poll? I’m on limited brain functionality, which may or may not be related to the fact my son has strep and I have not been allowed to sleep – if his moaning and whining at the exact moment I feel myself drifting off are any indication. Shall I bother to mention that this morning when Mr. DD and I were making the bed and he didn’t stack his pillows per my OCD and I corrected him that he snapped, “Back off! I was yawning.”

Yes. Well, there is that. Apparently, we both have been hit by whatever it is that makes us completely stupefied, crazy and just damned tired.

The pointless point I was going to hope to make – and let me first apologize for the assumption and to anyone who may get pissed off at such – is that while we (“we” being anyone diagnosed with some form of infertility) each suffer acutely the pain of infertility, the length of time we suffer does exponentially increase that pain; whereas having wealth can minimize the impact of the pain brought on by infertility. I would then have to squeeze in there a disclaimer of some type about government-funding on ART  * for my friends overseas and North O’ the Border and those who must calculate in six months of vacation due to OHSS regardless of what the omnipotent Sugar Daddy wants.

And since I knew it would take several paragraphs to justify my statement and several more to do the aforementioned apologies for ASS-U-MEing, I just virtually threw up my hands and muttered, “meh”.

I should mention that I found a couple of nifty sites, including this one that provides excellent debate fodder to use on our behalf against those numskulls who think infertility treatment should not be covered under insurance. You know how we love those assbandits.

Also, I was going to remind those of you who pay U.S. taxes that many expenses related to IF treatments should be itemized as medical deductions on your returns if the total expenditures exceed 7.5% of your annual income. Expenses can be as obvious as any of the office procedures and consults to the easily overlooked lodging and travel expenses.

See how potentially dull that post would have been? This one was so much better.

* See comments for input from those who actually know compared to me who pulls things helter-skelter out of my ass.

8 thoughts on “no. 532 – I Waited All Weekend For This?!”

  1. We were VERY lucky in that we had infertility insurance as well. And so we did pursue IVF relatively quickly. If we had to do it on our own, I have a suspicion that we would have raised the money to do one round of IVF. Just one.

    Because if that one didn’t work, then we probably would have cut our losses there and moved onto adoption sooner – just because we only have a certain amount we’re willing to spend on the whole thing.

    Having money probably cuts some of the agony out of the decision making because you have more options, rather than having to decide between only two options.

    But obviously it can’t change the outcome, and I often wonder if it’s setting yourself up for “well, I can afford another cycle, so let’s do yet another round of IVF” to the detriment of your marriage and mental/physical health.

    (Of course, I’m talking about a small percentage of the infertile population here. I am not sure where I read this statistic (and I might not be quoting it correctly), but I have heard that 80% of the infertile population end up pregnant after one or two cycles of IUI/IVF.)

  2. Yeah, and the variations from state to state are enormous. Though I guess most people can’t just pick up and move to a state where insurance is required by law to cover IF.

  3. Oh lord, yes coverage varies in Canada from province to province. *Apologies* Since my ovaries failed, I never qualified for IVF, but have used drugs, under my insurance.

    I guess I was just trying to make the point that even if IVF was paid for for me, it would never have mattered since none of the buttheads could ever figure out why I couldn’t stay pregnant longer than a flick of my fingers.

    I also know some people up here who had unlimited budgets for treatment, and it never helped. However, it DID allow the patient to buy a large quantity of scotch after every failed cycle.

    Can having money help? Absolutely, I just don’t know if it’s the be-all and end-all. I wish….

  4. assbandits. you said assbandits. (in your best beavis and or butthead voice).

    i couldn’t have afforded any of my treatment were coverage not mandated by state law. the mental anguish of IF was absolutely aggravated by the endless hours i still had to spend fighting the insurance bureaucracy, and to this day i regularly get those forms asking me to certify that i don’t have coverage through any other means. i’ve never suffered cancer or chronic illness. i always wondered if they would have hassled me to the point of despair they way i was hassled as an IF patient. i would have much rather have been able to write big checks. i’m eternally grateful to have had the chance to have employer-subsidized expensive private insurance that is required by law to cover IF, but man did they make it as difficult as possible to use. but i’m still way way better off than many many other women. even if it did end me up in big fat zeroland.

  5. Don’t know who you’ve been talking to as far as government funded ART for your friends “North O’ the Border” (unless you’re talking about Alaska) but ART is NOT generally funded in Canada. In my province, our infertility clinic told us up front that there is no insurance for any ART anywhere in the province. We did have a maximum of $5000 in drug coverage for some of the drugs (it ran out pretty damn fast).

    From what I saw, our ART is cheaper than what I have seen in the states but then it never worked for me and it may be a little of “you get what you pay for”.

    For the record, I think not having to sweat the expenses makes life in general a little easier. I certainly don’t think that it would make infertility a lot easier, it wouldn’t have in our case as I just couldn’t face doing any more IVF cycles after 4 failures. We paid for all of our IVF cycles outselves and that is not what still hurts, it’s the fact that they didn’t work and no amount of money would likely have changed that (I know, I know and then I lucked out anyway).


  6. Okay. Here it is. We had insurance. As a result, we were able to pursue treatment extremely quickly. Also, since our insurance covered 3 IVF’s and we had 2, we would have coverage if we decided to try for a THIRD child.


    I spent five weeks in the hospital. The twins were in the NICU for a week and a half. The overall cost came close to HALF A MILLION DOLLARS (cue Dr. Evil here).

    Cost to us?


    We pay a fortune for our insurance coverage, but it’s coverage that most Americans don’t even have a chance to buy. Did we suffer? Yup. Would we have suffered more and longer if we had no insurance coverage? You betcha.

You can say it here.

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